- Are You Too
Jealous? [quiz] - How Do We Break Our
Argument Pattern? [q&a] - Men Reveal Their
Most Common Lies [article] - 5 Secrets of
Getting a Man to... [article] - Are You a Nag? [article]
In a recent study, researchers at the Yale University of Public Health found that people in relationships have great influence over each other's behavior when it comes to health. The study found that as one person started to improve a bad behavior, the other partner often followed suit.
For instance: 30% of males and 28% of females followed their partner when he or she started exercising. And 29% of males and 22% of females followed their partner when he or she stopped smoking.
So even though it might feel like your spouse ignores you, and you have little impact on his or her behavior, take heart—you really do! And maybe that means it's time to kick start a healthy change and watch him follow you:
Commit to starting a regular exercise routine
Kick that smoking habit
Get that flu shot
And what about all the other good examples you can set that might make a difference, too? His inability to pick up his socks? His resistance to putting the seat down? Is there something that he does that really pushes your buttons? Tell us what habit of your partner's you would most like to change—whether it's health related or not. And see if other iVillagers don't share the exact same view of their partners...
116 member responses
iVillagers' Marital Wishes
whenever he has a bad day he always has a short temper with me...its very irritating! He always apologizes but then never fixes it.. I just dont know why he apologizes if he's just gonna do it again!
--Posted by ladi dadi da, hanover park, IL
My boyfriend of 2 years drives me crazy!!!GRRRR he always dominates the conversation. And when we argue I feel as if I have to yell at him just to be heard. and when I repeat myself I'm a nag. As if! What is it called when a man nags? I can't stand it. Although he will say sorry hes says stuff for keeps like tonight it was something along these lines, " well whos going to work on this budget you stupid f******g girl..." All of this comes after I spent an hour and a half at the library with him to work on our finances. It was about 10:00 at night and my cousin flo's been in town. So I've had a horrible migraine all day. Needless to say I find him to be an inconsiderate a**hole at the moment. I can only imagine what he'd act like if he was the one with spliting headache
--Posted by headache, san jose, CA
there are quite a few things my partner does that annoys me. Like leaving the toilet seat up and worse, not flushing. He also loves to drink milk -- OUT OF THE CARTON (and he's in his 30s!). And to top it all off, he works later in the day than I do, so he tends to stay up later and enjoys his midnight snacks. I always wake up to something in the sink... my least favorite is a spoon covered in peanut butter. Grrr.
--Posted by AustinGrrl, Austin, TX
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My husband has ADHD and he DOES NOT SHUT UP!!!! When I get home it's always "rant-rant-rant" "what do you think of this?" GAH!!! He is on the road all day long and listens to NPR and C-span, and gets all riled up and then wants to come home and rant, wheras I sit at a desk and have people coming to me from all directions during the day. So when I come home, I just need to have a quiet evening, but I can't because he's either all riled up because of a customer he dealt with or he's frustrated because he heard something on the radio during the day... He just CONSTANTLY needs my attention and I can't give it to him. AND don't get me started on the "projects" he starts and will work on for a few weeks and then NEVER finishes. I hate bugging him constantly, but if I don't he'll never finish him. I do love him, but my god, he never cleans up, never finishes stuff, never SHUTS UP!!!!
--Posted by anonymous
During this "last:" word, he insures he reminds me of all the times I've been even the slightest bit off correct during a conversation. He will never admit a mistake nor will he answer questions regarding situations that might make him look bad, Such as why he quit having intercourse with me 10 years ago. He blames that on me for telling him that the men he was in business with during those years would call me and tell me what he was doing and laugh at him. He says I make him sad because I don't appreciate what he does for me. I am always last on his list of things to do, I am always last to know his travel schedule and usually I am the last to know what his work is asking him to do. I am to sit around and be here when he comes home. If I do anything he doesn't like, he threatens to leave. I have fibromyalgia, lupus and severe arthritis. He just will not communicate or admit anything that makes him look in a bad light..even if its just in his own mind.
--Posted by 4thladybutterfly, bothell, WA
EWE! Tell that man you are not touching him until he bathes. If he don't, you'll find someone else who keeps clean. There are many other options and you don't have to stick around. Tell him he smells. NO more sex until he showers WITH soap and rises. Go find yourself a clean man. Yuck!
--Posted by Me