The second thing that affects our perceptions of ourselves as sexual beings is the birth process itself. When that baby passes down the vaginal canal, what once was a pleasure center is now a baby chute, and you may never think about it the same way again. On top of that, many women find that birth has altered the way they feel in the vagina -- the common complaint is that they feel "looser." Here's what you can do. Exercise the inner muscles, called the PC (pubococcyceal) muscles. These are the undergirdle of the pelvis in both men and women, also affectionately known as the "love muscles" -- even if you have not just had a baby, you need to keep these tightened up for good sex. I suggest that you do them once a day, three rounds each, at the same time each day. Use a method that will get you to focus on this act, such as when you floss your teeth at night, when you put the key in the ignition, when you watch the Today Show before your baby's morning feeding or when you head off to the tennis courts.